I miss my Nana.
I can't stop thinking of her.
Dreaming of and about her.
I am reflecting on how truly short life is.
Gone, in the blink of an eye.
I wish she was here to talk about life with me.
Have over an hour long phone conversations.
I don't understand why she had to go.
I can't believe she has been gone for over a month now.
I am sad and truly just beginning to process she is no longer with us.
I want to hear her voice and her nervous laugh.
I want to hug her and smell her Nana perfume.
I want to see her year round Christmas tree, on her dining room table.
I want to hear her fuss at Princess for acting like a maniac,
and then giggle to myself.
I want to hear her ask about May and O,
and I want to tell her how proud I am of them.
I pray for the "right words" to tell them when they ask about her.
I now ask her to watch over them.
I want to tell her I am sorry for not stopping in for a visit more often.
Because, now, I wish I would have.
I want her to know that even though I didn't understand some of her choices,
I never ever blamed her for situations that surrounded both of us.
I want her to know I have millions of precious memories of her,
that I will never forget.
I pray that she knows she gave me a great gift,
the greatest gift of all,
I hope she knows how much she is missed,
and how blessed we were to have her in our lives.
I know she is in a better place.
I feel the warm breeze on my cheek,
and I know she is with me.
I see one of her most favorite beautiful birds,
and I know she is near.
I catch a glimpse of her in my children's smiles,
and I see her smile.
I notice the cloud that covers the sun,
with the lovely silver lining.
I know she is telling me all will be okay,
and I am STILL with you.
I will always be with you.
I love you Nana.