Today

I miss my Nana.

 

I can't stop thinking of her.

 

Dreaming of and about her.

 

I am reflecting on how truly short life is.

 

Gone, in the blink of an eye.

 

I wish she was here to talk about life with me.

 

Have over an hour long phone conversations.

 

I don't understand why she had to go.

 

I can't believe she has been gone for over a month now.

 

I am sad and truly just beginning to process she is no longer with us.

 

I want to hear her voice and her nervous laugh.

 

I want to hug her and smell her Nana perfume.

 

I want to see her year round Christmas tree, on her dining room table.

 

I want to hear her fuss at Princess for acting like a maniac,

and then giggle to myself.

 

I want to hear her ask about May and O,

and I want to tell her how proud I am of them.

 

I pray for the "right words" to tell them when they ask about her.

 

I now ask her to watch over them.

 

I want to tell her I am sorry for not stopping in for a visit more often.

 

Because, now, I wish I would have.

 

I want her to know that even though I didn't understand some of her choices,

I never ever blamed her for situations that surrounded both of us.

 

I want her to know I have millions of precious memories of her,

that I will never forget.

 

I pray that she knows she gave me a great gift,

the greatest gift of all,

 love.

 

I hope she knows how much she is missed,

and how blessed we were to have her in our lives.

 

I know she is in a better place.

 

I feel the warm breeze on my cheek,

 and I know she is with me.

 

I see one of her most favorite beautiful birds,

and I know she is near.

 

I catch a glimpse of her in my children's smiles,

and I see her smile.

 

I notice the cloud that covers the sun,

with the lovely silver lining.

 

I know she is telling me all will be okay,

and I am STILL with you.

 

I will always be with you.





I love you Nana.

 

Love,

Mandy